Breakfast

There was no alarm clock to wake him up. Bob didn’t use alarm clocks. He didn’t believe in them. Instead, he just willed himself to wake up at the right time, and went to bed, confident that it would happen. Usually it did. Occasionally he overslept, but only when he’d stayed up late the night before, and he only stayed up late on nights when his wife wanted sex, so staying up late was a good thing (in Bob’s opinion). On a good night, he woke up late.

Last night had not been one of those nights.

His eyes opened and he peered up at the time, which was projected by his clock onto the celing in red glowing letters. In the darkness of the room, the time really stood out. It said 4:39, meaning that it was just about time to roll over and get out of bed. He could stay in bed a little longer if he wanted to, and if he had known what kind of a day was waiting for him he probably would have, but didn’t because his ability to percieve the future was extremely limited in the same way that it’s limited for most mortals who lived on the dirt-speck known as earth. So, not knowing that he should probably bury his head under his pillow and pray for death, he threw his legs over the edge of the matress and farted loud enough to wake up the dog.

Stumbling to the bathroom, he turned on the shower, the light, the fan, and then staggered over to toilet. Once he was done there, he looked at his naked body in the mirror and analyzed the fat deposits on the sides of his abdomen. Love handles – the curse that you could never get rid of. He’d give Xenadrine a try, if it were cheaper, but it was too expensive, and his wife didn’t want him wasting money. Things were tight, and they pooled their cash in one account. She was a Nazi when it came to letting him spend money on trivial things they didn’t really need, so he usually didn’t. It was easier to be cheap than to endure the bitching.

After a fifteen minute shower in scalding hot water, he walked out of the steaming chamber shaved, dressed and ready for the day. He put the dog out, and gave her a treat because she always expected one when she got back in. Then he grabbed his laptop and headed out into the darkness where his car was parked. The day was just beginning, and dawn was a long way off.